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Showing posts from October, 2021

LAST CYCLE

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"will I ever, do as you do, perhaps feel as you do." I'd like to think I've grown. Perhaps he's shown me so much of everything I've been missing, from you, all of which I hate myself a little for taking so long to fathom.  So here I am, after all these new things, new places, new people still encountering him for what feels like the last time each time. I think this one's a little frustrated with me, for not being to able to extract that part from me, for perhaps understanding he potentially never will or because it has become all on me. It's dreadful to watch. We're certified to be each other's everything in such completion, where if he moves, I do and breathing seems easier when he's around. He feels a little like a home I've needed, but I'm terrified to say it out loud that I still do, somehow, somewhere deep in this purgatory, know he owns me. Well isn't this instantly sickening. I felt the same with him a year ago. I took m...